Lions, Tiger, and Bears OH MY

I've been away from this for so long I feel like Brett Favre coming out of retirement. AGAIN. (I promise that is the only negative reference I will make to BF in this post) Speaking of the old man in purple, as much as I dislike him since he went to the Vikings, he is having one heck of a season. The great #4 has almost a 70% completion percentage, 24 touchdowns to only 3 interceptions. Let's remember who we are talking about again. This is the gunslinger of the NFL, the man who just threw it up for grabs for the heck of it. It's not a joke that he holds the career records for most interceptions in a season, much less has never had an interception total in single digits for a full season. It pains me to say this but he is certainly deserving of MVP consideration with the type of leadership he has brought to the Vikings. But let me ask you this Viking fans, what will you have gained from this season if you don't win the Super Bowl? Hypothetically, if Brett retires, obviously a big IF, where do you go from there? Will the season be considered lost if Brett doesn't bring home the Lombardi Trophy?

Anyways, in sticking with more NFC North talk, how about the Packers drubbing the Lions on Thanksgiving Day and the Vikings laying the beatdown on the Bears. If nothing else, this weekend for the NFC North definitely reflected the lack of parity within the division. Before the season many people were projecting a very tight 3-team race with the Bears addition of Cutler. Cutler has been nothing short of a catastrophic disaster in Chicago. The supposedly fierce matchup of Cutler vs. Favre could not have been more lopsided as Cutler added 2 more interceptions to his league leading total and Favre threw three touchdowns. Cutler was frequently mentioned in trade talks during the offseason with the Vikings and now the Bears and Vikings have gone in completely different directions. However, I would argue that Cutler would have much more success in Minnesota with the weapons that Minnesota has: landslide offensive ROY and dynamic WR Percy Harvin, the second-coming of Randy Moss in Sidney Rice, and oh yeah...what's his name? AP?

My Packers on the other hand, gave the Lions their 6th straight loss on Thanksgiving Day. That's a major ouch for tradition in Motor City land. However, what a gutty performance by Matt Stafford after his status was labeled as doubtful for the game. Yet, I still have to question the coaching of keeping him in the game and the dynamic yet hobbled Megatron, when the game was completely out of reach. Now if the Packers can come up with a big victory against the Ravens this Monday night, we might be well on our way to a Wildcard Spot.

Oh yeah...for that Tiger Woods fella. You are the best golfer in the world and the most private man on the face of the planet. You own a yacht called Privacy. Seriously?! It's obvious you value your privacy but let me tell you that the scrutiny you will face until questions are answered is unlike ANY putt you have had to make on the 18th green of a major tournament on Sunday. This issue will not just simply blow over and will get worse. I would hope you might put an end to the speculation and just answer some simple questions. Not to mention, your career is in jeopardy and you will be trapped without any carefully constructed responses to save you to silence the critics if your career takes a turn for the worse. Now I am not suggesting Woods is going to be uncompetitive but this is certainly an issue that will affect him until it is put to rest, which doesn't seem to be in any part of Tiger Woods' vocabulary at this point.

In totally unrelated yet somewhat related news, The Who will be performing at Super Bowl XLIV. (44 for the Roman Numerally challenged) Seriously CBS have you analyzed your primary demographics? I mean I am not a big fan of the Rolling Stones, who performed in 2006, but at least from what I remember they had their whole band. The Who only have two remaining members both in their mid-60s and they haven't had a hit in who knows how long. Unfortunately I can already see the headlines: Who performed at halftime? Or maybe it will turn into a big guessing game: Guess Who? (not to be confused with the 2005 romantic comedy starring the deceased Bernie Mac and Ashton Kutcher)

Anyways this about does it for me. Hopefully I made up for my extended leave of absence. Now where did i put my textbook?

Until next time...Adios Amigos.

Sleep is to Hibernation as Homework is to...

I Love College? Ok, I'm sure some of you might be familiar with the Asher Roth song depicting a drunken orgy of sorts. Thankfully, I actually have a legitimate excuse for my extended hiatus from the blogosphere contrary to Asher Roth's "accurate" depiction of college. Needless to say, not writing about the happenings in the sporting world for a whole month is like suffering a slow and painful death or for a less upsetting thought, watching M. Night Shyamalan's 2008 flick, The Happening--simply depressing. (Wait, that's just as upsetting) hmmm...

Anyways, I digress as usual. Let me get you caught up on my life and possibly explain my extended leave of absence. 1) I had to decide on a halloween costume. Yes, I know Halloween is still more than 1 week away but let me tell you in case you didn't know already: IT'S A BIG DEAL. After waffling over a couple different costumes for more than 3 years Brett Favre style, I am pleased to say that Jack Sparrow is currently being mailed to the small college on the hill, Gustavus Adolphus College. Yes, you heard me correctly, Johnny Depp is personally coming to visit me in order to transform me into a living, breathing imitation of his blockbuster Disney character in a couple weeks. Exciting, I know. Even better, Halloween is exactly one week after my birthday. (my 21st this year to be exact) Why is the rum ALWAYS gone?

2) The baseball playoffs are still occurring and unfortunately, I care about as much as Americans care about health care. Wait, that would mean I care more than Viking fans care about the Vikings this year. Ugh, I'm just confusing myself with contradicting similes. In the end, all that I want is for the Yankees to lose, which is pretty much what I want every year. The Cardinals had a meager display for a playoff baseball team and my AL team, the Twinkies, as thrilling as their 163rd game was, their NLDS against the Yankees was equally unexciting. However, if I had to pick one team it would be the Angels. After all they have most likely endured the most this season as one of their most promising pitchers, a 22-year-old rookie Nick Adenhart, was killed merely hours after throwing 6 scoreless innings for his Major League debut on April 9th.

Alas, they will most likely lose tonight in New York. BOOM, roasted.

3) In my hopes and dreams of acquiring a sports journalism job and associating with Kris Berman, Stuart Scott, etc. I am proud to say I am the new sports editor for my college newspaper, The Gustavian Weekly. As fun as it has been so far, some weeks have been fairly stressful. Apparently some college athletes don't want to be interviewed or in the media. Maybe they should get a lesson in "Craving attention 101" taught by Chad Ochocinco himself. Nevertheless, it has been some great experience so far and hopefully a huge resumé booster for my hopeful career. Although it is not the type of writing I prefer (sarcastic, satirical) and more news-based, I still try to incorporate some wit in the headlines and such. I guess I'll post again when I am more of a Jon Stewart or Stephen Colbert than a Bill O'Reilly of sorts.

I guess maybe I should get to the wonderful worldwide sports industry? Ahhhh, this has been too long as is so I offer this...

Vikings lose to Steelers. PLEASE LOSE SO MINNESOTANS SHUT UP.

Packers beat Browns. (If Derek Anderson plays at his MVP-level he's been playing at so far, this should be a no-brainer) *knock on wood*

Now if you'll excuse me, I'm about to take a nap comparable to the length/rock level of a Dave Matthews Band Concert--long and hard. (Insert Michael Scott reference here) "That's what she said."

FOOTBALL. FINALLY.

Ahhh the glorious day has finally arrived. It happens only once a year and just may possibly be one of the best days of my life. It is the ONE and ONLY day when Brewers fans finally realize their team will not be going to the playoffs anymore and I can join them in cheering on a legitimate professional sports team from Wisconsin...THE GREEN BAY PACKERS. Also known as the first Sunday of the NFL's season. Oh yeah, I get to see Terry Bradshow's beautiful balding head as well.

Now I realize that as I predicted, my alter ego procrastination bit coupled with a fair amount of what I had grown unaccustomed to this summer, homework. I also have moved into an apartment on the Gustavus Adolphus Campus and can honestly say I'm not used to doing dishes. Oops. The irony of my opening paragraph concerning the Brewers was that Prince Fielder still believes in the Brewers playoff hopes despite their 68-73 record. So much so that when they win a game, he ORGANIZED a walk-off celebration. Are you kidding me Prince? You won the home run derby, your team is terrible, and you are cocky enough to organize your own walk-off home run celebration. One word: Classy.

It is now 11:58 AM, Sunday September 13th. This means two things: 1) It has been 10 days since I posted last. Lo siento. (I'm sorry.) 2) It is now 2 minutes from kickoff in Cleveland in what will begin Brett Favre's tumultuous last season as an NFL player...I hope. Now I could really care less at this point that one of the most decorated quarterbacks in terms of holding career records will grace Canton, Ohio at the Football Hall of Fame with his #4 Packers jersey donned to remind everyone of his truly great days as a football player. What matters now is he has brought upon himself the abundance of gray hair at 40 jokes while still thinking he can play football. Can you say laughing stock of the NFL? Yeah, not too difficult.

It is now 12:09 PM and the Browns kicked a field goal on their opening drive making the score Browns 3 Vikings 0. This means Brett Favre will soon grace the field with his presence. YAY. NOT. I guess I can only maintain my sanity for so long documenting Favre's efforts in this latest football season since another faux retirement.

12:12 PM. 2 plays, 2 runs, 1 yard.

12:13 PM Favre: 1-1 for -1 yards. 3 and out.

WHAT A GREAT START. THEY ARE GOING TO THE SUPER BOWL. OH MY GOSH THE VIKINGS ARE SO AMAZING.

I guess it's only 1 drive but I can enjoy it while the Vikings less than specatcular play continues with #4 at the helm.

Since my punch line no longer works with procrastination circling like a shark in a pool of bloody water, Until next time...Adios Amigos. ARE YOU READY FOR SOME FOOTBALL?!?

PS If I'm in a mental hospital in St. Peter tomorrow, you will know why.

Brain Block...

Yikes, brain block sounds scary! No, I don't have an aneurysm just some sort of writer's block apparently.

As exciting as Curt Schilling, retired Red Sox pitcher, would be to write about after he announced he's serious about running for Ted Kennedy's Senate seat, I don't really get into politics.

As exciting as Michael Vick's NFL eligibility pushed up to week 3 of the regular season is, I'm just not very intrigued by it.

As exciting as the U.S. Open has been this week, (not very) writing about almost every men's seed getting through the early rounds while only one high women's seed has been upset so far in Russian Elena Dementieva is just not that inspiring.

And as much as I love fantasy football, I would rather wait to write about my sleeper picks and busts for the fantasy drafts until closer to the season.

So I have settled upon the conclusion that I have a severe case of writer's block or maybe that's just by default. You decide.

Until tomorrow...Adios Amigos.

Rubioing Out of the States...

With talent comes money. With money comes glamour. With glamour comes arrogance. (Often)

Now this doesn't hold true for most athletes in professional sports. Albert Pujols, Roger Federer, and Phil Mickleson to name a few. However, there are some that demand the spotlight and think very highly of themselves.

Jay Cutler, Brandon Marshall, hmm dare I say Brett Favre?, Terrell Owens, Chad Ochocinco, etc. Tentatively add to that list Ricky Rubio.

Ricky Rubio was the 5th pick in the NBA draft this year to the Minnesota Timberwolves. He shined in Europe playing for DKV Joventut and putting on a pristine passing showcase throughout the 2008 Olympics in Beijing. More than anything, his championship game performance against NBA stars such as LeBron, Kobe, and company elevated his draft status enough for the Timberwolves to take him with the 5th selection.

Only one problem.

He suddenly decided playing in the NBA, "would have just complicated my life a lot." Granted, the Timberwolves took the risk with drafting him that they would be able to orchestrate a deal to pay his buyout clause from his hometown club and bring him to the states.

However, after numerous meetings with Timberwolves president David Kahn in Spain, Rubio rejected his offers to come to the states and agreed to be dealt to Barcelona.

Rubio stated, "When the season ended, I entered the draft with the intention of going to the NBA. But some things happened that kept me from being ahead of the rest and I ended up No. 5, which I was happy with, but it didn't allow me the chance to go to the NBA. I tried, but in the end it wasn't to be."

Hmmm, it sounds like just a nice way of saying I dont want to play for Minnesota and I could do what I want even though I've never played a minute in the NBA. This is reminiscent of the Eli Manning and Philip Rivers draft situation a few years ago when neither quarterback wanted to play for the teams that drafted them so they eventually were traded.

Ricky, at 19 are you that egotistical that you want to personally direct where you end up in the NBA? Sorry buddy but it doesn't work like that. You will find out soon enough when you DO choose to jump to the NBA that you might have to learn a few things the hard way.

After all, if you didn't want to risk dropping to No. 5 in the NBA draft, why enter the draft in the first place. At least you realize that you can improve your game and raise your draft status for the future but one thing is for certain: When you are drafted, you will be drafted by a terrible team.

That's how the NBA Draft Lottery works. I guess I wish you the best and I guess you are Rick Rollin' your way out of the States Rick Astley style...except boy did you let Minnesotans down.

Until tomorrow...Adios Amigos

Who Ya Gonna Call...SHAQ!

"They call me Superman...Big Shaq where you at?
They call me Superman...Big Shaq where you at?

You can't stop it or block it when I drop it
Anytime I go rhyme for rhyme on a topic
Ain't even fit to step in Shaq's arena
I look inside your mind and I seen your shook demeanor
in your eyes, why are you surprised?"

I know what you are thinking, what rapper in their right mind would pretend to call themself Shaq. Well...Shaq!

You are probably asking yourself why I would open up a post talking about the newest Cleveland Cavalier when it's not even close to the NBA season. Well it's because I am somewhat quite enthralled with his new television show, Shaq Vs.

Indeed, Shaq has become so full of himself that he has decided to nationally embarrass himself on TV attempting to challenge the best athletes...AT THEIR OWN SPORT. He has already challenged Super Bowl winning quarterback, Ben Roethlisberger as well as the dynamic volleyball duo Misty May and Kerri Walsh. Now I didn't see his match up with May and Walsh but I did watch his show with Roethlisberger. Needless to say he held his own throwing the football as only a 7'1" 325 lb. big man could.

His latest episode aired this evening, attempting to take down the best all-around baseball player in the game today as well as my favorite player in a home run derby--Albert Pujols.

Besides being utterly foolish, Shaq provides some excellent color commentary, even joking around with Little League players watching him practice. He even goes so far as to ask Pujols' little son, AJ, who doesn't even come up to his knee, for some pointers in the batting cages.

Nevertheless, Shaq obliged the greatest baseball city with quite a show in the home run derby not to mention his home run fence measured a mere 200.' Remember the LLWS? Some of those kids are a third of Shaq's size and can hit it over that fence no problem. Shaq gave Albert all he could handle until Albert became...well, Albert. The contest spanned two rounds, Shaq got 10 outs, Pujols 5. Tied at ten, Pujols at the plate with 4 outs, Pujols proceeded to smash 6 straight homers out of the stadium much to the despair of Shaq and delight of teammate Ryan Ludwick sitting in the dugout.

As entertaining as the derby was, possibly the most touching moment of the show occurred when Shaq accompanied Albert to a facility for Down Syndrome kids and adults. Pujols' daughter, Isabella, has Down Syndrome and St. Luke's Hospital in Chesterfield, Missouri has recently announced their center for Down Syndrome will bear Pujols' name.

Pujols stressed how important it is to give back to the community and even better was Shaq's willingness to accompany Albert and greet some of these kids. After watching this episode, I only have one question:

Could baseball have a more commendable slugger to admire in the era of steroid scandals?

I think not.

Until tomorrow...Adios Amigos.

Rollin' Roger...

About two years ago marked an essential salvage of a season for one of the greatest athletes our generation has ever seen. It temporarily halted the run of his bullish arch nemesis and returned him to the peak of greatness.

Roger Federer. He is the epitome of gracefulness, confidence, and everything that is right in not only the game of tennis but sports in general. After Rafael Nadal's remarkable 2008 season that helped him overthrow the king of tennis with the #1 ranking, Roger shut the door on the 2008 season with his 13th major title.

In 2008 Rafael Nadal won his 5th consecutive French Open, running his career undefeated streak to 30-0 on the red clay in Paris. His encore? He captured Federer's reign over Wimbledon with an epic 5 set match and with it the #1 ranking in men's tennis which Roger had previously had a stranglehold on for the some time.

However, Roger rose to the occasion in Flushing Meadows and won the 2008 US Open over the strong Scot Andy Murray. Only 4 months later, Roger's hopes were dashed again by an 5th set meltdown against Rafael Nadal in the Australian Open. Despite his terrible play in the deciding set, I'd argue that it was the best loss of Roger's career. Somewhere in between his loss in Melbourne and his workouts up until Paris, something clicked. He pulled out a dramatic upset against Rafael Nadal on clay in Madrid just a week before the French Open.

Then, it all changed. Coupled with the surprising upset of Nadal in the 4th round and Federer's dominance in the tennis world over everyone except Rafa, Roger pulled out the career slam on the red clay and won his 14th Grand Slam title tying Pete Sampras for most all time. However, Pete never won the French.

Without Rafa in Wimbledon because of knee problems, Roger resumed his reign over tennis with an even more epic 16-14 5th set against Andy Roddick for the Championship.

If anyone bets against Roger, I have one word...foolish. Yet, he will face quite possibly the deepest men's field in a major ever.

Andy Murray, taking advantage of Rafa's injury leave, surpassed him in the rankings and will look to improve on last year's finish, which would mean winning the tournament. As weird as it sounds, Rafa may be the dark horse of the top men's players since he hasn't played too much recently but when he's on his game, we are all aware of the type of tennis he can play.

Rounding out the top players are Novak Djokovic, Andy Roddick, Juan Martin Del Potro, Jo Wilfried Tsonga, and Nikolay Davydenko. Andy Roddick will not only be the crowd favorite but the sentimental favorite after his crushing defeat in London at the hands of Roger.

My dark horse pick: Gael Monfils. He's probably the best athlete in the game, and intimidates opponents with his frizzy 'fro and powerful physique. Although I think two tall Americans have very good shots at making a surprise run. The 6'6" Sam Querrey has played a lot of tennis this summer and the 6'9" John Isner will both benefit from the quick courts exaggerating the movement and speed of their serves. Isner could have a very intriguing matchup in the 3rd round with Andy Roddick.

As for the women, their is only one name that resonates in the game. Williams. Both Serena and Venus have fully exercised their power within the women's game and although Serena is still #2 in the world she has won 2 majors this year to Dinara Safina's big fat 0 despite her #1 ranking. I fully expect either one of them to take home the trophy.

Yet as good as the Williams sisters have been lately, they will not succeed unchallenged. Kim Clijsters seems to have regained her form that made her a #1 player after a brief 2 year retirement. That sounds Brett Favre esque? Wait, his were only like 4 months.

AHH MAN. I was gonna make this a 100% Favre-Free blog. Guess I failed. Better luck next time.

Along with Clijsters, Maria Sharapova seems primed for a deep run into a major after her leave of absence because of injury. But if anyone is playing great tennis in the women's game right now, it's Elena Dementieva. She has improved her Achille's heel, her serve, and could finally get over the hump and win a major.

All in all, it appears the next fortnight at Flushing Meadows should be flush with excitement.

Until tomorrow...Adios Amigos.

Tiger's Toast

I watched a riveting round of golf. Wait, did I say that correctly? Yes, as oxymoronish that it may sound to some sports fans and the average person that hates watching golf, today's final round of the Barclays tournament in New York was nothing short of captivating and intriguing.

The Barclays was the first of 4 events that compose the Fed Ex Cup, which basically determines the best golfer of that particular calendar year. For those of you who only know about Tiger Woods, he was in the hunt, trailing by 5 strokes coming into the final round, which only is half of the reason for the riveting golf, and the other reason? Oh yeah, everyone ahead of him in the field had never won a PGA tour event with Tiger in the field.

All signs pointed to a Tiger triumph.

Why did you have to spoil all the fun Heath Slocum?

Believe it or not, Heath Slocum showed all of his nerves on the 18th hole needing a par to win and avoid a playoff with Tiger, Padraig Harrington, Ernie Els, and Steve Stricker if he also bogeyed. Daunting right? Apparently not for Heath Slocum, but a little extra drama always helps. Both Stricker and Slocum found the bunkers on opposite sides of the fairway. They blasted their bunker shots out short of the green. Stricker put his 3rd shot to about 10' from the pin while Slocum's sat atop a ridge about 20' away. At this point you are thinking Stricker has it in the bag and Slocum has no chance. After all Stricker is an extraordinary putter.

Unfortunately, I already spoiled the ending and Slocum poured in his putt, while Stricker's barely missed. So sorry, Tiger. Did I mention he missed a putt from about 7' on the 18th green to get to -9. Missed opportunities have really been killing him lately....

I was hoping to cover my U.S. Open predictions of the tennis variety, which begins tomorrow in Flushing Meadows, New York. Apparently my verbosity got the best of me tonight.

Also, I'm curious if the Chinese Taipei manager read my blog last night. He ordered his pitchers to issue 2 intentional bases on balls in the championship game. That's Albert Pujols-esque treatment. Unfortunately it didn't help their team as the kids from Chula Vista captured the LLWS with a 6-3 win.

Ok, I promise, tennis tomorrow. After all the Fed Ex as in Roger Federer is still in business since it's not Labor Day. That's next Monday.

Until tomorrow...Adios Amigos.

Lovin' Little League...

My name is Luke Ramirez. I'm 6'2" and 200 pounds. Not bad for a scuplted NFL athlete. Only I'm a 13-year old Little Leaguer from Chula Vista, California, located about 10 miles south of San Diego.

Can you imagine an average size 13-year old pitching to this kid? Maybe it's comparable to what most pitchers feel like pitching to Albert Pujols. Don't forget that Little Leaguers still use aluminum bats so if he even makes light contact the ball will explode like The Challenger.

What do Gary Sheffield, Jason Marquis, and Jason Varitek all have in common? If you guessed that they are Major League Baseball players, I could pat you on your back and tell you congrats. However, they are also the only three current Major Leaguers that have played in a World Series and a Little League World Series. I don't know a whole lot about the fundamentals of a baseball swing, but I think this kid Luke Ramirez could be a force to be reckoned with in the future. Am I jumping the gun a little prematurely? Possibly but it's obvious he can hit.

As I was watching the U.S. LLWS final tonight between Chula Vista and San Antonio, it was hard to maintain any interest since it was a blowout after the first inning. Try rebounding from giving up 9 runs in the bottom of the first inning both mentally and emotionally as 13-year olds playing in the biggest baseball game of your life. They appeared shocked, stunned, Brett Favred. Yes, I created a new verb. Brett Favred. Part of speech: verb. Definition: The inability to function after enduring an event so traumatic that it resembles the news of Brett Favre announcing another unretirement and the ensuing reaction. Synonyms (in present tense): shock, surprise, flabbergast, jolt, nauseate, offend, overwhelm, paralyze, traumatize, startle, etc. Need I say more? Ok, I get it your tired of the Brett Favre references. I apologize.

Needless to say, the kids from Chula Vista knocked the life out of the Texas team in just one inning of baseball. They hit 4 home runs including one grand slam and set a new Little League World Series record for most home runs with 18. They also had 7 in a game earlier in the LLWS against a Kentucky team. Luke Ramirez has 4 of those home runs and his teammate Andy Rios has 5.

Although the kids from Texas were basically done after the first inning, I saw fight, determination, and yet a desire to still win and have fun. Unfortunately the game of baseball is overshadowed by the glitz and glamour of the MLB. Oh, I almost forgot about the steroids! But that's not really a problem anymore right? Yeahhh, right.

The LLWS gives a platform for these kids to shine, while playing a game they love--baseball. There is no money, no steroid scandals, and best of all no whispers behind closed doors about who else could be juicin'. These kids remind us what's best about the game of baseball--amazing defense, home runs, incredible pitching, but most of all a desire to win, while having FUN.

Take note Manny Ramirez.

Until tomorrow...Adios Amigos.

Heisman Hopefuls...

HAHAHAHA...I just heard the best joke ever!!

Brett Favre was recently seen exiting a nursing home while supporting himself with a walker. Did I mention he was escorted by high school wide receivers and a man that apparently hasn't heard that Gillette is the best a man can get. Or is that Brad Childress? Looks like the Vikings may assume the fastest show on turf nickname sooner rather than later...

(Ok, I admit. I made that one up.)

I thought I would keep this post fairly brief, but I wanted to address some recent articles about the "frontrunners" so to speak for the Heisman. College football will kick off in full force in just a week's time.

It's no secret that the Heisman race will be led by three quarterbacks: Tim Tebow, QB Florida; Colt McCoy, QB Texas; and Sam Bradford, QB Oklahoma. The funny thing is Colt McCoy is actually considered the frontrunner this year even though the other two quarterbacks already have a Heisman in their trophy case. Tim Tebow scares opposing defenses with his unorthodox jump passes and bruising runs. However, with recent skepticism surrounding where Tebow will line up on Sundays, many college football experts don't think he will run the football as much this season. The reigning Heisman winner, Sam Bradford, lost a few of his playmakers to the NFL Draft but will still have a dynamite tight end in Jermaine Gresham. Thus, Colt McCoy has emerged as the early favorite. Maybe people are just drawn to his name...

Anyways, I have a slight problem with all this early hype before the season hasn't even started primarily because it seems that a lot of extremely talented players get totally ignored for the Heisman race. Consider this, in the past 29 years only one non-QB, RB, or WR has won the Heisman and that was back in 1997, with Charles Woodson the cornerback out of Michigan topping Peyton Manning from Tennessee. Peyton who?

I would much rather the hype and hoopla surrounding all these quarterbacks be absent from the offseason because it already gives them a head start on the rest of the competition no matter how good of a season they might have. I am a big fan of the hard-hitting safety Taylor Mays out of USC. He would have been a fairly early first round pick if he had entered the draft last year but chose to stay at school. He might get some Heisman consideration but he's already been lapped in media hype by the 3 quarterbacks.

Give the kids a chance to play and forget all the speculation. I understand quarterbacks are the one's that are the designated "leaders" so to speak but last time I checked there has to be 11 players on the field for the TEAM to play well, not one.

Until tomorrow...Adios Amigos.

Preseason a Prediction...

Correct me if I'm wrong but everyone loves watching a football game dominated by 3rd and 4th stringers, clinging to their roster position with the knowledge that one mistake might result in their demise and subsequent release. No?

Personally, I'd much rather watch ex-Big Ten QBs Jim Sorgi and Curtis Painter dissect a defense as opposed to Peyton Manning throw interceptions and looked befuddled running the offense. After popping a nice big bag of popcorn, I'd love to sit down and watch Ian Johnson's electrifying moves that he showcased on the Smurf field in Idaho instead of...shoot. I forgot his name. OH YEAH...Adrian Peterson. He only picks up like 1 yard every time he touches the ball. I would also rush home from a late night at work to be absolutely certain I don't miss Early Doucet's mind-boggling catches, while Larry Fitzgerald lolligags around the bench, dreadlocks blowing in the breeze.

OR...Is it the other way around? I'm officially confused.

Let me hit you with a statement and you can throw it back at me if you don't agree. PRESEASON IS POINTLESS. It'd be one thing if there wasn't any evidence, but I assure you with as much as a guarantee of Tiger Woods winning a golf tournament after holding a 54-hole lead that the evidence is clearly visible. What's that? Tiger Woods faltered in that situation? Hmmm...I wasn't aware. Guess my guarantee is a moot point. NOT.

No matter how you slice it, the preseason is just an extended high school soap opera of players fighting for their positions. If you find this aspect of preseason fascinating, I feel sorry for you. Fact of the matter is, besides maybe one or two positions on defense, offense, or special teams, most rosters are fairly close to determined. There might be a little shuffling between personnel groups but who honestly pays attention to that?

If you STILL don't agree with me, that's fine. I'll just throw some evidence out there. Last season Tom Brady didn't play a second in the preseason. The Patriots stumbled to an 0-4 record. Toast, right? Wrong. Brady gets hurt in the first half of the first regular season game and the Patriots finish 11-5 with a playoff berth. (Behind their same backup QB Matt Cassell that led them to that 0-4 record)

Please tell me you are closer to agreeing with me...

Baltimore introduced it's rookie QB from tiny Delaware last preseason and he led them to a spectacular 1-3 record in the preseason. Only he discovered he was throwing the football with his opposite arm. Well not really but, the Ravens became the surprise of the NFL last year behind Joe Flacco with an 11-5 record and an AFC Championship game berth.

Not there yet?

Drum Roll please...

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, PLEASE JOIN ME IN WELCOMING THE BEST NFL TEAM IN THE WHOLE 2008 PRESEASON......

THE DETROIT LIONS!!! *Applause*

That's right. The Lions ripped off four straight wins in the preseason. They proceeded to not win another game for another four months. Not so bad right? Except those last 16 games in those 4 months were the games that actually counted.

If you are not with me yet, then I've exhausted all my options.

Until tomorrow...Adios Amigos

Oh I almost forgot. Jared Allen, defensive end for the Vikings represented their team well when he stated that he didn't think anyone on their team even knew what a 'schism' was much less use it in a sentence. Allen thought it was an STD. Ha...I love those intelligent Vikings.

Ragin' Rick...

What if I was to tell you that you could cheat on your wife, pay the woman you had sex with for an abortion so that the affair was kept hush hush, and then lash out at the media for making your family's life "pure hell." Is that something you might be interested in? For any of you unfamiliar with the show Entourage and the famous movie director Bob Ryan's small part, you unfortunately might not find this as comical. Oh and did I mention you happen to be one of the most decorated coaches in college basketball?

No, I'm not talking about Bobby Knight but rather Rick Pitino, who led the Louisville Cardinals to the Elite Eight last year, eventually losing to Tom Izzo's Spartans. About a week ago now, reports were released that Pitino had sex with Karen Cunagin Sypher about six years ago. After telling Pitino she was pregnant and did not have medical insurance, Karen received $3,000 from Pitino to pay for an abortion, which he claims was for insurance.

Apparently Mr. Rick Pitino has tagged us all as insanely ignorant idiots.

This morning Pitino spoke briefly at a news conference following recently released audio and video recordings of an interview with Ms. Sypher in which she claims she was sexually assaulted. In response, Pitino attempted taking a position of power and discrediting the media for reporting on her accusations. Did you forget that you are being accused of a heinous crime here Mr. Pitino? Maybe you are the insanely ignorant one in this case...

Pitino made the greatest statement of all when he said in the press conference, "Everything that's been printed, everything that's been reported, everything that's been breaking in the news on the day Ted Kennedy died is 100 percent a lie, a lie. All of this has been a lie, a total fabrication of the truth."

Wait a second, I realize Ted Kennedy died, but in what part of this scandal is he involved? Hmm...I'll await your answer on that one.

Not only that but Pitino proceeded to say, "It has been pure hell for her and my family." (Referring to his wife.) Well DUH. You blatantly admitted you had sex with this other woman and then gave her $3,000 for who knows what. Maybe a Coach purse? Ha.

The least you could do was to politely admit your faults again instead of harshly criticizing the media who has your image as both a person and a college basketball coach in their hands. BIG mistake.

BREAKING NEWS.............FAVRE IS NOT WELCOME IN THE NFL ANYMORE.

Well, I wish. Apparently, there has been a 'schism' in the Viqueens locker room about players not being on Brett's side but rather in the camp of Tarvaris Jackson or even Sage Rosenfels. Wow Brett, did you ever think it would come to this? My greatest enjoyment may have been picking up the new issue of Sports Illustrated. I invite you to carefully examine the upper-left hand corner. Until tomorrow...Adios Amigos.

Plax's Problems...

Puerile

Laughable

nAive

eXtraordinarily foolish

Idiotic

Crazy

Obtuse

I thought it would be fun for my third post to play a game. What do all of these words have in common? Did I hear you correctly...Manny Ramirez?? Sadly, that is not what I am referring to but great effort! I think it is fairly obvious that these words have 2 things in common: Plaxico Burress and the associated adjective stupid.

Now, I didn't get a chance to catch Plaxico's interview tonight on E:60 as I was out to dinner. However, I was fortunate to catch a sneak peek on Sportscenter earlier this morning. As Plaxico describes it, he was frisked at the door to the nightclub and was allowed entrance despite the AK-47 hidden in his pocket. Ok, I exaggerated but really? He was allowed entrance despite carrying a gun. As he was walking up the stairs towards the VIP room with his teammate and buddy Antonio Pearce the gun started sliding down his pants. As he reached in to stop it he apparently pulled the trigger. But hold on, I'm getting to the best part. Firstly, nobody heard a gunshot. Granted this is a nightclub were talking about. Even though I'm tucked away in some Joe Schmo city away from the gun-slinging men of America, I do know gun shots are pretty loud. Secondly, he didn't know he shot himself.

Um Roger Roger. Shots fired, over. WHAT?? BY WHO?? Um we have a man down. It appears he shot himself, over. LIKE SUICIDE? Um no, accidentally, over.

Yes, Plaxico claims he didn't even know he shot himself until he saw red on his Converse shoes. Ok, I know you play football but a bullet hurts more than Ray Lewis right??

Despite all this, I guess we can expect nothing less than a comeback to the effect of Michael Vick in a couple years after Plaxico gets out of jail. Did I mention his wife is expecting? One word...stupid.

In other news, I decided that contrary to my first post I would cheer on Brett Favre on two conditions. 1: He must grow out his beard and die his hair and beard a deep, dark brown to honor Mr. Infomercial himself Billy Mays. 2: He must get a face lift identical to that of Michael Jackson in reverence to the King of Pop. Wouldn't that give the Paparazzi some fun photos. SHAMWOW!!

It appears Michael Vick may make his first appearance in the NFL this Thursday in the Eagles preseason game. Personally, I would think it might be funny to play the old Baja Men song, "Who Let the Dogs Out." Woof Woof. Also Roger Federer, new father of twins, was given the #1 seed in the US Open and he will attempt to win his 3rd major of the year. I know I'm not the only one hoping for a Fed vs. Nadal final.

Finally, I guess I should address my picture i posted. My lame attempt to imitate the fastest man in the world, Usain Bolt. But I guess he had to be fast given his name. He set new records in the 100 and 200 m dashes. Even more surprising he didn't try to show off before he crossed the finish line leaps and bounds ahead of the competition.

Oh yeah, my St. Louis Cardinals are making a late season push toward best record in the NL and have opened up a virtual lock for a playoff berth with their 9 game lead over those Cubbies. I'm only praying for one thing from now until October: No SI Cover. Until tomorrow...Adios Amigos.

Sophomore Slump...

Ahhh the sophomore slump. Or in this case the sophomore post. I refuse to cave into the widely held stereotype that the sequel hardly ever lives up to its predecessor. It appears the sophomore slump is so prevalent that it even has it's own page on Wiki, which refers to it as "an instance in which a second, or sophomore, effort fails to live up to the standards of the first effort." Now for those of you not familiar with Wikipedia, (but who isn't today??) having its

own page must mean the sophomore slump is a big deal right? Well not really but who cares. We all know it exists.

For example, I'll take some recent players who have endured or are currently enduring a sophomore slump. Remember Carnell "Cadillac" Williams. He was the NFL Rookie of the Year in 2005 and then his numbers dropped dramatically in 2006 recording only 1 touchdown. Then there was Emeka Okafor, the feel good center out of UConn. He won a national championship and then preceded to take the NBA by storm, winning...you guessed it--the Rookie of the Year honor but then falling victim to that sophomore slump bug again. Finally, Geovany Soto, currently the Cubs catcher and 2008 Rookie of the Year may be the worst example yet. He is only batting .217 with 9 homers and 27 rbis after clubbing 23 homers last year. As one of my favorite musicians, Jason Mraz, put it in one of his songs, "The sophomore slump is an uphill battle and someone said that ain't my scene." Well his second album wasn't as good as his first but I think that pretty much goes without saying...

Anyways, I feel like the world of deportes today is about as exciting as John Daly's paisley pants. Or is it the other way around? Only John Daly knows.

If there is one thing that excites me most about this week it might just be Michael Vick's appearance in Philadelphia's preseason game. We all know Philly has a fabulous reputation for fans....HA. City of Brotherly Love or City of Doggy Love? We shall soon find out.

Until tomorrow, Adios Amigos.

Maybe I did succumb to the sophomore slump after all. I swear it's not my fault. Maybe someone should just give Plaxico a gun in jail. Now that would make for some interesting news.

Favre's Follies...

Wow. I can finally call myself a noob. For those of you unfamiliar with the terminology of online gaming a noob is a slang term for someone new to Internet activity. (aka newbie). Yes, this is the beginning of my blog on none other than the media giant ESPN. Or sports if that makes you more comfortable.

For those of you who don't know me or may find me on the Internet...Name: Seth Wisner. Height: 4'8". Bats: R. Throws: R. Ahhh apologies, I was reading my 6th grade baseball card. How rude of me not to properly introduce myself. I am currently a junior at Gustavus Adolphus College (a small liberal arts college in Minnesota) and I'm aspiring to be a sports journalist. Surprised? Thought so.

But I digress. As a Wisconsin resident for the last 18 years, it seemed like my first post was handed to me on a platter when Favre announced his unretirement AGAIN last Tuesday. Yes, I admit, I was an avid Favre supporter in his great days in Green Bay and own a Favre jersey that I am now closer to burning than framing. Along with everyone else in Wisconsin, I think it's pretty safe to say I was extremely thankful a couple weeks ago when Favre announced he would surprisingly stay retired. Only to feel the wrath of Favre's selfishness overtake the media once again last Tuesday. I only came to one conclusion: Brett Favre wanted the NFL to be renamed the BFG or Brett Favre Guild. This is not to be confused with his lollipop-loving Munchkin brothers in the land of Oz (if only his ego was as small as they were). OR Roald Dahl's famous book The BFG (The Big Friendly Giant). Brett Favre is far from big and friendly to Green Bay anymore. How can the face of the franchise for 16 of the past 17 years, tell Green Bay that true fans would understand. EXCUSE ME?? Ummm....Mr. Favre? The Green Bay Packers continue to be the ONLY, yes you heard me right, ONLY professional franchise owned by the city and not some corporate giant. They are controlled BY the fans and may have the most devoted fans in the BFG or excuse me the NFL. To understand their beloved quarterback broadcasting his desires to join the arch rivals across the Mighty Mississippi is frankly impossible.

In short, Favre is egotistical and far too senile for NFL quarterbacks. After all, he does have a torn rotator cuff. My only question: How long until Favre gets blasted and can't throw a football much less lift his arm past his shoulder? Will TJack and Sage just disregard all their animosity towards Childress after he lied to their whole team during the offseason and sprint onto the field ready to lead the Vikings to the promised land? I think not.

In other, much less exciting news, Eric Bruntlett turned the first unassisted triple play to end a baseball game since 1927. My St. Louis Cardinals appeared to have made another spectacular pick up off waivers with 42-year-old John Smoltz tossing 5 shut out innings of 3 hit ball with 9 punchouts. Oh and the Yankees beat the Red Sox but who cares about them except for...well them.

For anyone who finds me via the internet or is just interested in whatever I have to say, I plan on posting every night about this wonderful world of sports. However, my alter ego procrastination may bite once in a while during the school days that are fast approaching. Until then...Adios Amigos. Me encantan los deportes. (For those of you less fortunate to know español, Goodbye friends. I love sports.)